12/30 edit - HMMM - Glad to see that Cathy Guisewhite is a loyal reader! Check out the cartoon for today!!
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It's Christmas, and we all know that the period between Thanksgiving and Christmas is that "oh gosh - I'm going to gain 5 lbs" time of year. To heck with shopping, Christmas cards, family time.... it's all about food!
Watching too much Food Network lately has made me realize how differently people can interpret the same message. It's something that was explained in the 7 Habits of Highly Effective People kool-aid session that I went to earlier this year, and it made sense, but this whole week of Food Network has really driven it home.
Essentially, we all receive the same identical data from a message -- and a message can be something intentional (a conversation, an e-mail, a commercial) or something non-intentional (experiences and sensory input). BUT what happens is that we all filter it differently and process it differently. What I read / see / hear is the same actual data that you read / see / hear (assuming you are in the same place with me), but how we interpret that data can be very VERY different.
Since it's that time between Thanksgiving & Christmas when as a nation we all obsess over food - eating it, not eating it, cooking it, sharing it, wearing it - it's only appropriate that I visit this topic around food. I don't think there's one person in this country that is legally sane and not in a coma that doesn't think about food. It's as much a part of this time of year as Christmas trees, turkeys & shopping. So why is this worth mention? It's that whole FILTER thing.
According to TV, newspapers & magazines, we are supposed to be showing our love by feeding others right now. Thanksgiving stopped being about giving thanks for the things we have a long time ago, and became a competitive cooking contest. FOOD FOOD FOOD! Why do we celebrate the things that we have (and I mean non-material things here) by cooking & consuming at least twice the food that we normally have on a daily basis in just one meal? How did that become the appropriate and expected behavior? Why do we celebrate by eating ourselves into a food coma and then throw away enough food to feed another family? (And if you are one of those perfecto types that uses every single scrap & turkey bone to feed the family for the subsequent week - well enjoy being in the minority).
Then comes Christmas! Well, I shouldn't say Christmas. I should say FOOD MONTH. Think about what is considered a "traditional" Christmas. Bake cookies. Have parties. Have a Cookie Exchange where you trade cookies with others. Eat cookies. Drink eggnog. Bake more cookies (gotta have some for Santa). Have Christmas Eve dinner. Have a rich breakfast for Christmas Day. Christmas dinner. Cookies. Pies. Candy. Cake. Turkey. Eggnog. Eat eat eat EAT!
Then comes January 1st and everyone jokes about gaining a few pounds and goes on a diet. For most people, this is just the way it works. But what about the fat people?
Fat people go along and make the same jokes about gaining weight during the holidays. But for most, it's a show. Fatties look at the skinny people and watch them eating everything seemingly without care, whereas the fatties have to hide what they are doing. Everyone has looked at a fattie eating something rich & nasty and thought those "haven't they realized what causes them to be fat?" thoughts? But you'd walk past a skinny person at the same table eating the same rich & nasty food and think "that looks YUMMY". Don't worry - it goes BOTH ways. Fatties look at a skinny person eating a plate of bacon cheese fries and think "don't you KNOW what is in that??!"
It's a vicious double standard, and that makes the fatties have more than the usual food stress at this time of year, along with those that love them. A mom that has an overweight kid is reluctant to bake or buy Christmas cookies because she knows that people judge him (and HER as well) by how he looks. But the kid doesn't understand that mom is trying to help him and just wants Christmas cookies cause that's what were "supposed" to do at Christmas.
A fattie goes to a Christmas party and there's nothing there that's "safe" to eat other than the veggie tray, and even then the ranch dip is a bazillion fat grams in it. "Did you try the crab dip or those cheesecake bars?" And even if you decide on having only one nibble "just to be polite", it always ends up with you getting more bad memories of making bad food choices than the good memories of spending time with friends and family.
It's not "just" Christmas that causes this -- even just an innocent backyard bbq in the summer can be a pitfall with hamburgers & hot dogs & macaroni salad. The fatties don't want to be even more "different" by bringing their own food (cause that makes the host feel guilty about not accomodating you and just highlights the special category fatties are in), so they just try to fit in and not think about it.
We don't think twice about accomodating vegetarians, people with allergies or other cultures/religions, but somehow feel offended by the fatties and their food requests.
So this Christmas, let's try to find some memories and show our love to others without involving high fat, high calorie foods. In fact, let's try NOT to show our love via food at all. Food does NOT equal LOVE people. They are both 4 letter words, but they don't mean the same thing. Don't give kids a cookie when they are sad, give them a hug.
And if you have a party or Christmas meal, try out some healthy but tasty alternatives (I personally LOVE Hungry-Girl for real food that rocks) as your main choices, not as the consolation "oh - I'll grab a veggie tray at the store" prize for the fatties.
Watching too much Food Network lately has made me realize how differently people can interpret the same message. It's something that was explained in the 7 Habits of Highly Effective People kool-aid session that I went to earlier this year, and it made sense, but this whole week of Food Network has really driven it home.
Essentially, we all receive the same identical data from a message -- and a message can be something intentional (a conversation, an e-mail, a commercial) or something non-intentional (experiences and sensory input). BUT what happens is that we all filter it differently and process it differently. What I read / see / hear is the same actual data that you read / see / hear (assuming you are in the same place with me), but how we interpret that data can be very VERY different.
Since it's that time between Thanksgiving & Christmas when as a nation we all obsess over food - eating it, not eating it, cooking it, sharing it, wearing it - it's only appropriate that I visit this topic around food. I don't think there's one person in this country that is legally sane and not in a coma that doesn't think about food. It's as much a part of this time of year as Christmas trees, turkeys & shopping. So why is this worth mention? It's that whole FILTER thing.
According to TV, newspapers & magazines, we are supposed to be showing our love by feeding others right now. Thanksgiving stopped being about giving thanks for the things we have a long time ago, and became a competitive cooking contest. FOOD FOOD FOOD! Why do we celebrate the things that we have (and I mean non-material things here) by cooking & consuming at least twice the food that we normally have on a daily basis in just one meal? How did that become the appropriate and expected behavior? Why do we celebrate by eating ourselves into a food coma and then throw away enough food to feed another family? (And if you are one of those perfecto types that uses every single scrap & turkey bone to feed the family for the subsequent week - well enjoy being in the minority).
Then comes Christmas! Well, I shouldn't say Christmas. I should say FOOD MONTH. Think about what is considered a "traditional" Christmas. Bake cookies. Have parties. Have a Cookie Exchange where you trade cookies with others. Eat cookies. Drink eggnog. Bake more cookies (gotta have some for Santa). Have Christmas Eve dinner. Have a rich breakfast for Christmas Day. Christmas dinner. Cookies. Pies. Candy. Cake. Turkey. Eggnog. Eat eat eat EAT!
Then comes January 1st and everyone jokes about gaining a few pounds and goes on a diet. For most people, this is just the way it works. But what about the fat people?
Fat people go along and make the same jokes about gaining weight during the holidays. But for most, it's a show. Fatties look at the skinny people and watch them eating everything seemingly without care, whereas the fatties have to hide what they are doing. Everyone has looked at a fattie eating something rich & nasty and thought those "haven't they realized what causes them to be fat?" thoughts? But you'd walk past a skinny person at the same table eating the same rich & nasty food and think "that looks YUMMY". Don't worry - it goes BOTH ways. Fatties look at a skinny person eating a plate of bacon cheese fries and think "don't you KNOW what is in that??!"
It's a vicious double standard, and that makes the fatties have more than the usual food stress at this time of year, along with those that love them. A mom that has an overweight kid is reluctant to bake or buy Christmas cookies because she knows that people judge him (and HER as well) by how he looks. But the kid doesn't understand that mom is trying to help him and just wants Christmas cookies cause that's what were "supposed" to do at Christmas.
A fattie goes to a Christmas party and there's nothing there that's "safe" to eat other than the veggie tray, and even then the ranch dip is a bazillion fat grams in it. "Did you try the crab dip or those cheesecake bars?" And even if you decide on having only one nibble "just to be polite", it always ends up with you getting more bad memories of making bad food choices than the good memories of spending time with friends and family.
It's not "just" Christmas that causes this -- even just an innocent backyard bbq in the summer can be a pitfall with hamburgers & hot dogs & macaroni salad. The fatties don't want to be even more "different" by bringing their own food (cause that makes the host feel guilty about not accomodating you and just highlights the special category fatties are in), so they just try to fit in and not think about it.
We don't think twice about accomodating vegetarians, people with allergies or other cultures/religions, but somehow feel offended by the fatties and their food requests.
So this Christmas, let's try to find some memories and show our love to others without involving high fat, high calorie foods. In fact, let's try NOT to show our love via food at all. Food does NOT equal LOVE people. They are both 4 letter words, but they don't mean the same thing. Don't give kids a cookie when they are sad, give them a hug.
And if you have a party or Christmas meal, try out some healthy but tasty alternatives (I personally LOVE Hungry-Girl for real food that rocks) as your main choices, not as the consolation "oh - I'll grab a veggie tray at the store" prize for the fatties.
2 comments:
Your post made me sad.
It's so true though. Last year was the first time in XX years that I didn't gain weight over the holidays. I actually lost weight for that matter, because I took up this new and exciting hobby called, "interval training"... yea, I know. Weird. So this year I'm a little anxious about the holidays, not because of the usual stress, but also about the 3-5 pounds I want to avoid at all costs. Because on a 7 mile run I do not need an additional 5 pounds to haul around with me... I haven't made the "obligatory cookies" yet, but we have to. And we're hosting, so I feel obligated to cook 200 pounds of food....AHG!
((I'll confess that we did eat every scrap of turkey though, and I have 96 oz of turkey soup frozen. (seriously, that's the real number, AND we ate it twice for dinner)))
You do realize that when people see you eating a sweet or savory treat and they think, "well, if I ran 29 miles a week I could eat like that too".
Speaking of Sean, which we weren't- on my final note, I would like to vent my frustration at being married to SEAN. Live a minute in my shoes. Not the running shoes. The eating ones... OK, I cook a nice moderately healthy normal meal. I eat my portion. Sean eats 5 portions, 2 extra rolls. I gain 2 pounds. Sean loses a pound. Bastard. So, over the holidays, he might gain 1/2 pound eating every single thing on the table, plus sampling every flavor pie that's offered... with whipped cream.
Hey Pam I've been trying to reach you about some things for the WGBC website. What is they best way to get in touch with you?
Thanks,
Jayson
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